You’re Not Cool For Hating On “A Star Is Born,” You’re Just Miserable

Every time something good comes along someone has to shit on it. Doesn’t matter what it is, if it’s good, if people will like it, some mouth breather swoops in with a “well ackshually,” anti take letting you know this thing you enjoy is in fact bad and you should feel bad for enjoying it. This is particularly true for pop culture. As soon as a song, movie, book, whatever, reaches a certain level of popularity the frequency of people rushing to let the whole world know they never liked this thing in the first place becomes more adamant than the people enjoying it. Last night was no different. As the Oscars progressed the shitposters dropped their shitposts all over the timeline like dysenteric pigeons at a Mercedes dealership. For some reason “A Star Is Born,” seemed to get the majority of the hate. Look, it’s perfectly fine to not like something, but it seems no one told all the haters that as fine as it is to not like something it’s more fine, preferred really, to do it quietly. You’re not cool for hating on “A Star Is Born,” you’re just miserable.

Before I go any further I should clarify. I’m not writing this as a defense of the movie. I enjoyed it, but it’s not cinematic perfection. I think the director missed an opportunity to give Jackson and his brother Bobby’s relationship a larger part, and I didn’t really like that the audience was asked to just accept the only thing we needed to know about Jackson’s origin is he’s a talented substance abuser. If these criticisms or any actual criticisms at all had been made last night I wouldn’t be writing this. But they weren’t made. Instead it was “UgGhHh am I the ONLY person left on the planet who like could not care about A Star Is Born??” No, Becky you’re not. You’re not even the only person left on your block who doesn’t care. I know twenty-six years of your dad indulging the most selfish part of your personality has rendered your worldview incapable of recognizing the existence of any human being that hasn’t done something for you, but there are whole ass civilizations that don’t care. You’re one of probably at least five figures worth of people who, in fact, do not care.

I think that’s ultimately my gripe with the downers. They love to condescendingly condemn and convict people for engaging in groupthink and tout themselves as these remnants of individuality but they’re no more unique than the people they’re hating on. It’s smugly hypocritical and they don’t even see it because they’re too busy standing on their tip toes atop their soapboxes begging the world to acknowledge how different and star-spangled special they are. But let’s be honest, they’re not special. None of us are. There are seven billion and some odd people on this planet. Someone, somewhere, is going to share an opinion with you and just because you can’t reconcile the inexistence of your own individuality doesn’t mean you have to attack people who are just fine liking something a whole bunch of others do. How about instead of begrudging someone’s interests you spend that time and energy creating your own personality, even if it just so happens that a few elements of it align with a few other people. Until then, stop hating on “A Star Is Born,” because you’re not edgy, you’re not cool, no one’s looking up to you or lauding your bravery for questioning the popularity of a well recognized imperfect movie, they’re just pitying you for being the miserable bastard you are.

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